Sunday, June 10, 2012

Sunday Salon - Drama, drama, drama

I am the mother of 3 daughters...2 who are teenagers, only 16 months difference in their ages.
To say that drama in our lives is a mainstay would be a serious understatement.
When I started blogging 3 years ago, I was naive enough to think that blogging would provide an escape from some of that drama.

I should have known better than that.

Now, before I get started with this rant, let me just say that I have no part whatsoever in any of this drama.
Thank goodness.
And, I'm going to say/insinuate with photos some things about women that are stereotypical.
Get over it.
I'm a woman.
I'm raising young women.
Whether women like it or not, we are sometimes our own worst enemies.

Lately, there seems to be a lot of drama in the book blogging world.
I will  not be naming names bc I refuse to give any of the participants any more attention than they've been  given already. But, one of the more incredible "discussions" even involves an author who's angry over a particular blogger's review of her book.  The agent got involved as did other bloggers...and the sh*% has more than hit the fan with groups of bloggers taking sides and posting on Twitter, Facebook, on blogs etc. where they stand on this particular situation.
What would have been intelligent conversation between author and blogger about the book in question and the debate over what makes a good read for the individual...has turned into a bitch slap.

Everybody wants to wear the proverbial pants in this wrestling match...with the major argument being who is worthy of wearing those pants...who is worthy of making the decision on what makes a book "good."

Um, am I the only one who sees how stupid this argument is??

I want to say 10 things about this ridiculous drama:

1.  Every. single. one. of. us. is. entitled. to. her. own. opinion.  Get. over. it.

2.  Expressing your own opinion within your own blog is expected; however, if you call someone an ugly name, you're essentially asking for a rebuttal...and not necessarily a nice one.  You started it, so don't get mad when somebody else steps in to finish it.

3.  Children in preschool and kindergarten are taught to play nice.  Adults who forget this very important societal expectation should probably sign up for therapy and/or medication.  I should know.  I do both.  They work.

4.  Negative reviews are a reality.  (See #1). Most bloggers I read go out of their way to address the positives and negatives for themselves as individual readers...what worked for them, what didn't and why.  If you can't handle constructive criticism, then you probably need to just stay inside your house.

5.  If you attack nice people, go ahead and expect their friends to stand up for them.  People, there's a way to disagree with someone without ATTACKING them.  What are we...intelligent human beings or crocodiles???

6.  Yes, it's your blog and you can say whatever you want.  However, you choose to open your blog up to the rest of the world when you join this online society.  See #2.

7.  If a particular blogger/author/person gets on your nerves, use your DELETE button.  You don't have to read their stuff and you certainly don't have to comment on it.
You really don't.
 It's kinda cool.  I have a physical delete button on my computer as well as a symbolic one I use for real life :)

8.  Why are we arguing about books?????  I teach.  I see glimpses of the future every single day when only 2-3 of my students have ever read a book.  Many of those who enjoyed reading when they were young children eventually got tired of someone trying to tell them what they should read and what they shouldn't read.  My middle kid hates to read...hates it.  If she picks up anything...and I mean anything...and says she wants to read it, I hand her the $.  Even if what she picks up is not something I would normally read.  I'm glad she's reading...and I want her to learn to learn higher level thinking skills that come along with analysis and evaluation, making choices and logically defending those choices.  Blind conformity - going along with the choices of others just because - is not pretty.  Please see any of the dystopian novels in publication right now.

9.  Variety is the spice of life.  If we were all the same, we might as well go ahead and sign up for a futuristic army whose sole purpose is to carry out the wishes of Big Brother. (Yes, I'm on a dystopian kick today)

10.  We all have preconceived notions about lots of things.  I happen to like German Shepherds, but some people don't...and they feel very strongly about their dislikes of German Shepherds.  That doesn't mean we have to fight about it.  I prefer big dogs to small dogs based on preconceived notions and my own personal experiences with dogs of varying sizes.  That doesn't mean my way is right and there's is wrong.  We can all live together/read together in harmony and even disagree in harmony...if we choose to.  The only other option is a fight to the death...and in that case, nobody wins.



  1. Well said, indeed.

  2. Praise Jesus! I think a whole bunch of people need to grow up and put their big girl panties on. I stay as far away from this crap as I can. Had enough of this in high school. I don't know specifically what event you are referring to, but it could be any one of a dozen that has happened in the last six months. Oy vey.

  3. So very true! And bloggers/authors (I am both!) should take heed.

    I saw an example of these kinds of attacks a couple of years ago when one blogger posed the question about why so many adult women were drawn to reading primarily YA books. Now I thought of it as someone seeking information. She really wanted to know.

    She got so many attacks from YA bloggers that she eventually closed down her blog.

    An interesting dialogue/conversation could have ensued. But didn't.

    Very sad....

    Thanks for sharing, Patti, and thanks for visiting my blog post about reading, blogging, and furniture

  4. You're right; we miss out on so many conversations bc of quick reactions without thinking things through first. It is very sad.

  5. I'm really glad I have no idea what you're talking about.

    1. I wish I didn't...interesting that it reminded me first of all of the stuff my teenagers deal with, right?

  6. Replies
    1. Just sooooo ridiculous...and sooo many other worthwhile conversations to have :/

  7. This drama always starts on Twitter. I'm too busy in real life to hang out on Twitter waiting to get into a scrap with someone. These bloggers need to step away from the sand box.

    Of course, the bloggers in question will never see your post (words of wisdom if I do say so) because they are too busy tossing sand into each others eyes.

  8. I don't get Twitter updates either...and now I'm glad. I also don't understand the idea of sitting around trying to find a scrap? I'm genuinely sorry for those who need a scrap to keep their lives going...very sad indeed.

  9. wow! I've really been behind the times - I have no idea what or who you're talking about but the tips listed are perfect! and ps - I love German Shepherds - have had one all my life until my Sadie passed away 4 years ago. Fantastic dogs :-D

  10. Honestly, Stacy, I think we're better off not knowing about a lot of this stuff. My Layla is the best dog I've ever had :):)