Saturday, July 6, 2013

Girl Talk Part 2 - Hoohah Update :p

You can find Girl Talk Part 1 here if you missed out on the fun.

Still sitting on the old donut pillow, yes I am.

Still haven't been able to run, no I haven't.  


I am making progress :) 

At my post-op appointment, I called my doctor a liar for saying I would be able to run after two weeks.  
His excuse was that the cyst in my Bartholin's gland turned out to be 10 cm. and created a much larger, deeper wound which would obviously take a little longer to heal...4-6 weeks instead of 2.  
He removed the cyst, the gland, and some surrounding tissue bc he was actually concerned once he got in there and saw how big this thing really was, but all the pathology came back clean. 
I have no cancer...just a big hole in my hoohah...well, a hole right next to my hoohah...
Never mind.

Because of the size of the wound, the dr. performed what's called a marsupialization.
He actually stitched up the sides of the wound so that it would stay open in order to drain.
Is that too much info??  
How about this??

Go ahead, ladies.  Cross your legs tightly.
I'll wait.

The doc says that even though things don't look normal "down under," my vaJJ actually looks exactly like it should at this point.  He gave me permission to slowly begin adding back any physical activities I wanted to.
Except sex.

Oh really, now...

First of all, are you kidding me??????
Second of all, why does it embarrass us to admit to our gynecologists that we even have sex in the first place...?
Third of all, no more talk about sex or my teenagers will move "down under" to Australia!

I'm not in pain anymore...just tired of the mess...tired of 2-3 baths a day.  Tired of boxer shorts.  Tired of big baggy shorts and wearing them like a thug.  Tired of standing up all the time.  
So tired that I put my little skirted swimming suit on the other day and mowed the fenced in portion of  our backyard around the deck and pool with my Aunt Bea mower.
It felt so good to be outside, doing something physical! I snapped my headphones on and almost went for a run.  
And, then I thought better of it and went and took another bath.  
Just that little activity earned me a pain pill and a night with my legs up in the air.  Not unbearable pain mind you...just a my hoohah.  
When all this is over, I'm never using that word again.


I promise.

I contemplated a shot of Jack Daniels last night after my running partner, Layla, jumped our backyard fence...again...since she's obviously not getting enough exercise.  
Then, I dreamed about running all over the neighborhood without feeling tired at all.  
I think it's time to get back outside.  

Monday is Day 1.
Get ready, hoohah!!

This is Twilight's Nikki Reed with her GSD Enzo...just in case you thought it was me ;)


  1. Hoorah for the non-cancerous hoohah!

    I missed your earlier post but will go check it out now. Sounds terrible but I'm very glad your sense of humor is still intact!

    1. I've known this surgery was inevitable, so I prepared myself for it. At the last minute, I decided not to teach at all this summer and that was such a blessed decision; it took a lot of the stress away from the healing process.
      Might as well laugh, right :P

  2. I am sorry it is taking longer than you hoped. I am VERY happy that you don't have cancer. That had to be the best news EVER.

    1. Yep, Patty...I hesitated to even whine about the healing process when I know it could have been worse.

  3. Oh, no! I'm so sorry you're going through all this. I had NO idea. (Obviously, I'm behind in my blog reading.) Glad you're no longer in any pain but what an ordeal.

    1. It has been a pain, Melissa, but I'm glad to be on the downside finally...I can really tell a difference every single day. It's just a slow process.

  4. What a pain - literally! I find it funny that doctor's always say it will take less time to recover than it actually does.

    1. I think mine knew I was a step away from fleeing the exam room when he said it was time to do surgery. I've been researching the surgery for a while bc I knew it was inevitable; I didn't want to do it, but at the same time, I was well prepared. I had even watched the surgery performed on YouTube!! :P

  5. My first thought when I saw the picture was "my baby's going to come out of that?!" Even though I watched it happen the first time I still can't believe it. I'm glad that you're healing well but 10 cm cyst--yikes!! What a blessing and a relief that there's no cancer. And Wahoo for day 1! xo

    1. LOL!! I understand completely, Trish!! In all my "research" before, during and after surgery, I've seen videos and photographs that just stunned me and literally left me speechless when considering the true strength (both physical and mental), of women through the "natural" processes of our biological lives. I'm so excited about your new addition, and your little Ellie is such a cutie!!

  6. Recovery seems to take forever! It def feels longer than it actually is especially if you're wanting to return to running. My daughter is recovering from surgery right now and she has a lot of the same "I'm tired of..." that you listed.

    Take it easy and enjoy Day 1 :)

  7. Oh bummer! This is no fun. My mom had fibroids and got her whole uterus removed, so I know how miserable this whole deal with the hoohah can be. Hope you feel better soon! I hope you had a great time outdoors today!

    1. During this recovery, I've wished a time or two that I could remove my enter female anatomy :p I am getting better though every single day :) Thanks!

  8. Take it easy and ease back into things. Don't mess up the hoohah! ;)

  9. Oh goodness, not fun. Hope you are at 100% soon!