Thursday, January 19, 2017


5:49 a.m.

My post yesterday about Monday's schedule ended at 11:15 when I was scrolling through FB.

FB aggravates me, and sometimes I avoid it all together.
But, FB as a tool, or as something I design for myself to meet my individual needs...can actually be a pretty cool place.

At church last night while we waited for our kids to finish their youth session, 3 other ladies and I talked about FB.

One very specifically talked about how frustrated and angry she feels when she scrolls through her angry and frustrated that she "just has to stay off there" sometimes.  
I feel this way too...a lot.

My tenure as president of a local animal rescue organization came to an end in December. 
When I scroll FB, I have so many contacts in the animal rescue world that my newsfeed is overcome by animal rescue photos, articles, rants, etc.
Not the positive kind.

I've been an animal rescuer since I was a little girl.
And I suspect I always will be.
But there is only so much that my heart can take...especially after the last 4 years of seeing the suffering up close and personal.

Someone along the way told me about the HIDE button on FB.
I don't want to "unfriend" my contacts...many of them I do indeed like and call them FRIENDS.
But my heart needs a break.
And that's not just with animal rescue stuff...

In recovery, I'm learning that guarding my sobriety is A#1 paramount important.
Anything that threatens my sobriety has to be put away.
(Obvious exceptions to the parts of my life that aren't going away and must be dealt with)

I'm "putting away" rescue.

I've hidden the posts that hurt me.
This is for me...I'm not trying to say that those posts that tear people's hearts out don't have a purpose.
But, for me, right now, in this season, they have to be hidden.

It took few days of hiding...but Tuesday when I was scrolling through  my newsfeed, I was actually laughing.
FB became a place to scroll quickly for a smile or two.
A place that offers encouragement.
A place that puts a smile on my face.
I found myself "liking" and "loving" other posts and even sharing some of the smiles I'd received. 

Lord knows, we need to share the smiles.
We sure seem to share enough of the other stuff.

This one was one of my favorites and I'm still laughing as I struggle to upload the dang thing here.

These were my other favorites from Tuesday...

I have 3 daughters.  Need I say more.
(Full Disclosure: the Lucy in the bottom right corner is not me anymore ;) 

This one made me smile because I know this dog.  
He's one of the highest energy dogs I met over my tenure at the ARL.
Jubi was in danger of being euthanized for an adoption that wasn't well thought out in the first place.
Because we are small, our organization worked with other organizations in cases like Jubi's to make room for dogs like him...those who needed a little more one on one and a little more time...time to find the right owner.
Our shelter was just that...a shelter. 
I like that part of rescue.
I know that Jubi will not be adopted out again until the people are right. 
Big smile and feeling of comfort.
Deep breath.

Teacher humor, y'all.
After you've taught for 20+ years, I'm beginning to believe that a certain amount of madness (crazy madness, not anger) begins to set in. 

Remember that part of Willy Wonka where he's just spinning and spouting off nonsense?

That's a teacher.

Me, y'all.

6:28 a.m.

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

The Daily Grind

5:12 am

I was thinking yesterday afternoon about my schedule.
I have always balked at structure...but apparently it is exactly what I need.
I feel better on the days that are "scheduled"...I think I sortof feel less like I'm flailing about if there is some sort of map to follow.
Of course that brings with it the very possible beating myself up if I don't follow the schedule...or if I don't get something checked off the list. 
But I'm working on that.

I've backed my wake-up time on work days to 4:30.  
I gave 5 a.m. a try but I still felt rushed.
My reality is that I'm better in the mornings for the sit down and think types of tasks.
When I try to sit down and think in the afternoons, I just sink and fall into a state of blah.
Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays are especially blah because I have 4 classes in a row.
By the end of the 4th class, I'm pretty much a zombie.
So sitting at my desk or anywhere for that matter, to accomplish a reading or writing task is not happening.
My daily schedule on any given day looks similar but not the same bc of my class schedule, seasonal sports, workout routines, etc.
All the more reason to try and have a structure to follow.

This week Monday was a holiday so we began the week on Tuesday.

4:30 a.m. 
Get up, choose a coffee cup, start coffee, let the dog out...and wait for her.
Choosing the cup is paramount, people.
I've forgotten the dog a time or two...that's why I have to wait for her.

Quiet time begins

Check teacher inbox and answer any messages that came in through the night.  Start the workday with a clean slate. 
Do not answer emails all throughout the day.  
Carve out times specifically for this purpose so that I don't feel connected to work 24/7.
I don't want work to define me.
My brain has a really hard time with that.

I hear Reagan's alarm clock go off.
We're testing using the cell phone as an alarm clock.
We shall see.

Tell Reagan to get up and that she won't be able to keep her cell phone in her room if she doesn't get up on time.

Reagan miraculously gets up.

I've been buying Reagan sandwich and snack supplies as she requested.  
But she makes her own lunch.  
I don't have time for that.

Leave the house.
Reagan's school is 30 minutes away.
I choose to take her myself instead of riding with a carpool because I just like it.  
I feel like with my older daughters I was very distracted...and missed out.
I don't want to miss out again :( 
Most of the time we listen to her music on the way to school...usually an education for me.

Reagan arrives at school.
We say our good-byes

I listen to my music on the way back home. 

On Tuesday mornings I'm testing out going to Wal-Mart in the am.
I hate Wal-Mart.

I live in rural Mississippi so I don't have lots of options. 
Unfortunately, or fortunately...I don't know.
Wal-Mart does seem to have better prices than our community grocery store on some items.
That makes me sad...but we have to follow a budget...or attempt to anyway.

On this well-meaning Tuesday morning, I took my list (often forgotten)...and then pulled right into the track where I sometimes run.


My brain did not want to go to Wal-Mart apparently so I started my day by re-arranging the structured schedule...before 8 a.m.

I ran my slow 2 mile workout with C210K
I've backed up to the basics to repair my form and breathing.
I have a marathon to run in Dec. and that's not going to happen if I don't get some things straightened out.

 back home for a shower only to realize my husband is in our shower and my oldest daughter is in her shower.
I stretched instead while trying to patiently wait for someone to get out of the shower.
Patience isn't a virtue of mine so I began to get a little testy.
While doing yoga.

9:20 a.m. 
I finally knocked on the door and said, "I've got class at 10:00 am.  When are you coming out of there?"

I made it to work at 9:55 a.m.
Ponytail day, no doubt.

I taught my class from 10-11:15
I'm struggling a bit with my students...and it's only the 2nd week of school.
They seem so needy.
Aren't they supposed to be college students?

I sat down at my desk, looked at my calendar, answered emails, and checked Facebook.

No, Facebook was not on the schedule.
I do have legitimate reasons for checking FB. 
I'm working with a group of ladies who use social media for business purposes.
I'm volunteering to help the animal rescue organization for which I was president keep up with their social media posts.

But I get distracted.
Yesterday's distractions were good though and I was laughing before I knew it.

That does not always happen with Facebook.

5:51 a.m. - I'm over my 30 minute writing commitment...I think I've found something to write about :)