Friday, December 22, 2017

Candlelight Mornings




10:00 
This morning is the first "everybody sleeps in" morning of the holidays.  No exams for my last school-age child and late night re-runs of Friends mean she'll be down till noon or later.  The oldest is in her bed downstairs as well.  We sat with her a while last night as she wrapped gifts and watched That 70s Show.  I do not need to get pulled into another tv show.  That's for sure...but it's good to spend time with my girls doing things they like to do...and it's even better that sometimes they don't mind me doing those things with them.
I'm not a perfect mom.  I hope I'm done trying to be.  All I can do is go from here.
Happiness and resilience may be the best gifts I can give them anyway.

We closed on our house yesterday.
Owning two houses at the same time was not great.  It created a lot of stress and lack of funds. Yeesh.  We are both incredibly glad that our house sold quickly.  We know that's not the case with a lot of people who have to buy before selling their old house.

I struggled with panic as we sat in the lawyer's office yesterday.
I had to walk outside on the porch and let the sun warm my face and a cool wind wash over me before I could get myself back together.  
Once the closing attorney called us in and began passing the multitude of papers across the table for us to sign, my breath once again became shallow.
I started talking at that point.
Chit Chat.
Nothing special...just talk.
A distraction.
It worked for a while and got me out of there in one piece.

My big girl Layla had her regular vet checkup yesterday, and we may be facing a health crisis with her.
She has what may be a tumor on her cornea.
We'll make an appt. today to see a canine opthamologist in Ocean Springs.
Yes, that's really a thing.
Our local vet said that one of his partners "probably could" remove it for pathology but the best guy for the job is in Ocean Springs.
I'ma take a "best guy for the job" over a "probably could" any day.
We're talking about an eyeball here.
Not to mention a member of our family.
We don't do that "it's just a dog" thing here.

I picked up a turkey this morning.
At the local Spay and Neuter Clinic.
True Story.
P.S. the turkey was frozen.

10:12

I also got to talk to an old teacher friend of mine at the Spay Neuter Clinic.
I haven't seen her in a while and couldn't get over how fabulous she looks. 
Weight Watchers.
All these people keeping looking fabulous with Weight Watchers.
And when I say fabulous, I don't mean skinny as a rail with their skin hanging off.  
When I say fabulous, I mean "glowing" and healthy...with smiles on their faces...and smaller pants.
I can't do gimmicks.
I've seen the sassy commercials that talk about WW as an old way to lose weight.  
WW has been around a long time.
It's stood the test of time a lot longer than some of the new ways to lose weight and I think more importantly, to maintain it...learn how to eat...call a spade a spade when it comes to emotional eating...encourage people to take part in realistic exercise that be sustained for a lifetime.
Sustainability.
I like that.

10:17

I spent entirely too much time last night on Amazon reading reviews and sales pitches about Essential Oils and diffusers. 
Who knew there were so many options?! 
I finally chose one and ordered it.
We shall see.

I'm ready for a nap this morning.
And may very well take one before the lunchtime meeting today. 
The room was so hot yesterday that I had to eat two snack bags of Skittles in order to stay awake.
Re-read the paragraph on Weight Watchers now.

10:20

I'm way behind on book reviews, so to clear my brain, I'm probably going to do a couple of shorter snippet posts with several reviews in one.  
My brain will like that I think.
Clear those shelves and move on.
My brain is having a hard time with ebooks right now.  
Does anybody else forget they have books if they only have them on ebooks?
I may have to let those go for a while.  
The main benefits I've found with ebooks is that they are much more convenient when traveling and if you're buying books, ebooks tend to be cheaper.
That's pretty much it.
I give up on audio books.  I'm too visual...I'm too tactile.  I need to hold and touch the pages.  I need to underline things.  
Audio books make me kindof nuts.  
I end up having to re-read a book I liked anyway so I'm not sure what the point is.
I'd much rather listen to a podcast.  

10:25

The key to my serenity I think is to keep all this stuff balanced somehow.  
Not overwhelm myself.
Let things go.
More discipline.
Write things down.
Check off the list.
Copy over things that don't get done.
Take naps.
Spend time with my dog.
Light a candle first thing in the morning.
Say my first prayer of the day by candlelight.
Keep it simple.
Apply grace to myself and others.
Speak kindness.
Say Merry Christmas as many times as possible.
Be nice.
Stay out of traffic.
Love.

Did I mention take naps?

10:30




Thursday, December 21, 2017

Acceptance and Amazon Prime





8:41 a.m.


  my children - they have no idea how grounded they keep me.
no idea.

  FedEx - they will deliver my middle daughter's Christmas on time in Montana.
Doesn't matter that I essentially had to buy the box a plane ticket to make it there before the resort she's working in closes the mailroom on Friday.
Run, Run, Rudolph!

  the Furminator bath my GSD will receive today. GSDs are called German Shedders for a reason. PSA for those thinking of getting one.

 my hairless house after said dog gets the Furminator treatment.  Keeping my fingers crossed anyway.  Could seriously use one of those iRobot thingies for the upstairs and the downstairs...just afraid the pittie mix would attack them or retreat into panic mode...or both.
True story.

  literally and figuratively closing doors on the past - Closing on our old house happens today - I'm all about owning only one house at a time - so is my wallet, and so is my husband's stress level.
I'm not sad.
That's a little weird to me.
But, I'm going with it.

  Amazon Prime - seriously, do I even have to explain this? I bow to you, Amazon, your free shipping, easy returns, fantastic customer service, and a Christmas shopping season I can deal with.

early morning shopping - get out, get it done, go home...before the rest of the world catches on.  Only for things I can't get on Amazon of course.

Gift cards - seriously - who doesn't love to go shopping on someone else's dime.  I know my girls do and I am happy to oblige.  
Ditto what I said about Amazon in #8.

What I am grateful about is the crazy things in my head are actually NORMAL.
Normal.
It's ok to be ok and then not be ok.
Guess what?
Life is like that for everybody.

8:53


my husband who knows how to get the hot water heater to heat our water for my nightly shower...and his willingness to put down whatever he's doing to make hot water happen for me when I've decided it's time.

bedtime - I don't always like it because I can very easily get caught up in IG, FB, Twitter, etc. long into the night.  But, bedtime is almost as important to me as this list.  I'm much better when I adhere to 10 p.m. bedtime.
If it's not done by 10 p.m. it's not getting done.
Amazingly all those things not done by 10 p.m. seem to be just fine waiting till morning so far.

9:11